Why Our Grandparents Lived Calmer Lives (and What We Can Learn)

There was a certain rhythm to the lives of our grandparents.

Not untroubled, not flawless, but serener in a way that seems almost antique in the current climate.

Their days were not governed by notifications or deadlines one after the other. The passage of time was slow, not because life was simpler, but because life was lived intentionally. Even in the midst of chaos, the possibility of a pause was always present.

It’s a world that’s hell-bent on efficiency and speed today, and their way of living is almost radical by comparison. But what was their life that was quieter, and how might we hear it again?

A Life Guided by Ritual, Not Rush

Our grandparents didn't separate "spiritual life" from daily life. It was a ritual interwoven with and indistinguishable from the ordinary.

Mornings typically started with small chores like cleaning the house, lighting the diya, burning incense, and saying a silent prayer. Evenings were softened by familiar routines: tea at sunset, conversations, and quiet reflection.

These weren't pomp and circumstance events, but rather grounding signals for the mind.

From an Ayurvedic perspective, such rituals help to titrate the nervous system by creating predictability and safety. Repeated sensory cues, scent, light, and sound tell the body when to wake, when to slow, and when to rest.

The calm was not something they pursued.

It was an art they had practiced.

Living Through the Senses, Not the Screen

There existed a sensory-filled existence prior to the age of screen fixation.

“The smoke of incense lingering after prayer.”

Bells, birds, or people talking in the distance.

Smell, particularly, proved to be a strong factor. Natural scents belonged to the home environment; they were not luxuries to be added. Incense made from resin, herbs, and wood not only perfumed, but it also defined moods.

Today’s science tells us that odor directly influences the limbic system, the part of the brain where emotion and memory are centered. Grandma, although she didn’t have our knowledge, knew what our bodies responded to.

Certain scents reminded them of their rituals, which made them feel safe.

Rest Was a Rhythm, Not a Reward

Rest was not guilt-filled.

Afternoon breaks, early dinners, and uneventful evenings were not manifestations of a lack of diligence but rather of self-regulation. As per Ayurveda, resting helps maintain ojas, which is the subtle body fluid that boosts a person’s immunity.

Now, tiredness is a badge of honor. Then, taking a rest was seen as a necessary maintenance. Their calmness was not the result of doing less, but knowing when to stop.

In Sync with Nature’s Pace

The seasons were important. Days were tied to the sun. Eating, sleeping, and working followed rhythms with changing seasons.

This attunement with Nature served to regulate bodily cycles. When the outside world was sluggish, so was life. When the mornings were quiet, so were minds.

Even in the simple act of incense burning, this philosophy can be observedfire, air, earth, and plant all meet in balance. The importance of this reminder: calm in balance rather than in mastery.

Community Over Isolation

Stress had somewhere to go.

There were shared meals, shared stories, shared silences. Emotions weren’t processed alone. The community acted as a buffer against mental overload.

Calm doesn’t always come from solitude-it often comes from feeling held.

What We Can Learn Today

We don’t need to abandon modern life to reclaim calm.

But we can borrow what worked.

Create one daily ritual that slows you down.

Light incense not as background fragrance, but as a pause.

Let scent mark the shift from noise to stillness.

When you burn natural incense, notice how the space changes. The air thickens. The moment deepens. Your breath follows.

Our grandparents didn’t have wellness apps or productivity hacks.

They had a presence. And perhaps that’s the calm we’re all trying to find again.